Am I Giving My Child Too Many Presents?
As parents, we all give our child a new toy from time to time as a substitute for time we could have spent with him. However, if you do this too often, it can lead to spoiled behavior. Read on to find out how you can prevent your child from getting too many presents and what the consequences are if you spoil him or her too much.
Gifts versus time and attention
Of course, the love you feel for your child is immense. However, that unconditional love can also make you think that your child deserves all the toys in the world. Still, in the end, time and attention are the best gift you can give your child.
If you are very busy and therefore do not have much time to spend with your child, you are more likely to spoil him or her. A spoiled child is often easy to recognize because they will ask for a new toy in every store. What about you? Do you spoil your children?
There have always been spoiled children, but spoiled behavior has become more common since the 21st century. Our lives have become busier. If you also lead a hectic life, it is important to organize your time well and make time for your child.
That’s the best way to avoid spoiling your child and make sure he grows up well.
What exactly does ‘spoiled’ mean?
The word ‘spoiled’ refers to always giving in to a child’s wishes. It can be described as giving gifts or toys too often.
Spoiled children realize early on that they can have anything they want. Moreover, they know very well how to manipulate their parents so that they eventually give them what they want. Spoiled children are usually easy to spot because they are always whining.
Spoiled behavior can also be a sign that the parents are not spending enough quality time with their children. Believe it or not, most children ultimately would rather spend time with their parents than a new toy.
Do you recognize yourself and your child in what we have described above? Do not worry! You can easily reverse spoiled behavior by setting standards and goals for receiving a gift. For example: your child will not receive a toy until he has achieved good grades in school.
How do I know if my child has been spoiled?
A common sign of a spoiled child is that they are constantly asking for gifts and toys. However, there are also other signs:
- A low tolerance limit.
- Quickly frustrated.
- Little fantasy.
- Materialism.
- fickleness
- Pickiness.
- Overly focused on consumption.
- Selfishness.
Children are of course also influenced by their friends and classmates. When a classmate or friend gets a new toy, your child will probably want that too.
How do you deal with such a situation? First, realize that every family is different, and then work with your family on how to give gifts.
What are the consequences if your child has too many toys?
If you give your child too many presents, it will have consequences for both your child and the people around him or her. Some examples:
- Unnecessary financial expenses.
- The child may become isolated from the parents.
- Difficulty with self-expression, both long and short term.
- Possible development of personality complexes.
- The child becomes intolerant or frustrated.
- Little or no sense of the value of people and things.
What can parents do to prevent their child from being spoiled?
Give your child time and attention
Our job as parents is to ensure that our children can learn and grow up in a healthy environment. It is therefore important that you spend some time with your child every day.
Do different activities or play games together. This will make your child realize that quality time with other people is the best gift there is. Another good idea is to surprise your child with trips to his or her favorite restaurant or amusement park.
Teach your child the value of a gift
The best way to help your child appreciate any gift is to help them understand how to buy a gift.
Teach your child that you have to work in order to be able to buy presents, and how much each toy costs. In this way he will start to look at material things with different eyes. In addition, it encourages him to start working himself when he is older and helps him on his way to adulthood.
Teach your child the rule of four
Another helpful tip if you tend to give your child too many gifts is to only buy gifts that fall into the following four categories :
- Something your child can wear or carry with them.
- A book.
- Something he really wants.
- Something he needs.
Examples of gifts that fall into these categories include: a scooter he can use as a means of transportation, a new book by his favorite author, felt-tip pens for a drawing or project, or something your child has been asking for for months.
This also helps to prevent the toys from piling up in your house, and your child no longer playing with them after a few weeks.
Teach your child to play without toys
The best gift for your child is companionship! If you play with your child for an hour every day, it will help prevent your child from displaying spoiled behavior. Moreover, you immediately improve the relationship with your family.
If you are really busy, ask your child to sit next to you. He or she can then read, sing, or paint. You do not need toys for these activities. If you want it to be quiet, reading and painting are the best options.
Remember that love is the best gift
As Van Gogh said, ‘What is done with love is done well.’ Even if you have a lot of work to do, always make time to listen to, talk and play with your child.
This is immediately a good way for both of you to relax and gain confidence that you can say anything to the other person.
Conclusion
By spending more time together, you can avoid giving your child too many presents and spoiling them.
Play games together at home, or go to the movies or the park. Even if you get bogged down in your work, keep making time for your child every day!
Hopefully this article has helped you to reflect on your own situation. Start valuing the time you spend with those you love more than material things. Set a good example for your child so that he will eventually adopt this behavior from you.
